Two men stood in an elevator, each shifting around nervously. One of the men was getting a little excited. “I can’t take this anymore, the air’s getting stale, I can’t breathe…how long have we been stuck in this elevator, ten, twelve hours?”

“It’s been ten minutes,” the second man responded. “Just relax.”

“I can’t relax, I gotta get outta here, I gotta go.”

“I gotta go too pal, and you have no idea how bad. I really should have gone before we left, but I didn’t think it would be such a long ride.”

“RIDE!?!?” the first man exclaimed. He didn’t appreciate the joke. “You act like this is some kind a boat ride at Epcot! I might as well be on the boat crossing the river Styx for all the fun I’m having. Don’t you understand the gravity of our situation. WE’RE GOING TO DIE IN HERE!…Oh I feel faint, I think I have a fever…feel my head.”

The second man paused for a moment and looking at the first man tried to determine if he was serious. “I am not going to feel you head.”

“Please! Just see if I have a fever.”

“I don’t even know you,” the second man laughed incredulously at the notion. “For all I know you could be some kinda sicko who arranged for the elevator to stop just to get someone to feel your head.”

Now it was the first man’s turn to look at the second man and wonder if he was serious. “What kinda Sicko wants his head felt?”

“Hey they got feet sickos and shoe sickos, I’ll bet they got head sickos too.”

The first man collected himself for a moment. He honestly couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Look,” he said, “if you could just tell me I don’t have a fever than maybe I could calm down a bit, it would allow me to tell myself its all in my head.”

“You don’t have a fever.”

“You didn’t even touch me!” the first man screamed. Feel my head!”

“Nothin’ doin’.”

“What kinda human being are you?” he went on with exasperation, “I could be a very sick man.”

“I think I already said that.”

“Not that kinda sick!” He was at his wit’s end. He stopped and took a few breaths, regaining his composure. “Your compassion is nothing short of Mother Theresa’s.” He said sarcastically. “I mean here we are, two fellow human beings trapped in an elevator, with death hanging over us. In this kinda situation we should feel the deep human need for companionship, we should relish in the security of each other…”

“You are a sick man.”

“We should feel compelled to bond with each other, in the face of adversity.”

‘That’s it let me out here. I’m not bonding with you anywhere. Not here, not in the face of an advertising company, nowhere.”

The first man sunk to the floor exhausted. “I give up. I’ll just lie here and die of my fever, while you climb out the trap door or something.”

The second man looked on the first with jubilation. “TRAPDOOR!? Oh I could kiss you! I didn’t even think of it. You are a genius.”

“Oh I see, first I’m a sicko and he won’t touch me, and now I’m a genius and he wants to kiss me. Well you can forget it pal, I’m not that kinda guy. Besides you’re not my type.”